It’s increasingly clear that Ange Postecoglou has taken Spurs and somehow – genuinely quite impressively, really – made them more Spurs than they have ever been before.
What you have historically been able to rely on from Spurs is an entertaining team that has some very good days and some eye-wateringly bad ones while never really being any real long-term threat to you if you are one of the serious clubs that tries to do things properly.
Even this week, Angeball has delivered in the grand manner with a 3-0 win at Old Trafford the centrepiece of what was otherwise an almost cartoonishly unconvincing yet undeniably real five-match winning run that ended in the most absurd defensive collapse imaginable to turn a 2-0 half-time lead into a mortifying 3-2 defeat at Brighton, one Spurs fans now have the pleasure of stewing on throughout the international break.
The ‘Ange out’ talk is barely above a whisper but it’s there and surely only going to get louder. Plus, the November international break is just the time Spurs like to embark on a wild, whiplash-inducing change of direction and there’s definitely the potential for Angeball to become so very silly over the weeks ahead that a desire for something more serious starts to take hold.
So who are the possible contenders for the most poisoned of Premier League chalices? According to the latest odds, these poor sods.
9=) Julen Lopetegui
Just in case you were at all worried this might be a deeply uninspiring list, we kick off the top 10 with a man who couldn’t hack the nonsense at Wolves and is currently flailing around unconvincingly at London’s second most reliable source of Premier League chortles. So yeah, not a strong start.
9=) Gareth Southgate
Say what you like about Gazball, but it definitely has none of the silliness of Angeball. A lot of the nonsense would be ironed out. Kalvin Phillips would be brought in on loan. Dejan Kulusevski would be pushed out to the left for some reason. Spurs wouldn’t be as good as they occasionally are under Postecoglou, but nor would they ever be as bad as they frequently are.
As an added bonus, the whole ‘never quite makes the final step required to actually win something’ problem that damages Southgate’s credentials for any other top job in the Premier League is of no concern here.
5=) Julian Nagelsmann
Spurs have long coveted the German manager, but the idea seems more far-fetched than ever now he is the literal Germany manager.
5=) Eddie Howe
Not beyond the realms of possibility if the timelines were different but Newcastle’s start to the season makes it harder to see how Howe leaves Newcastle before Ange leaves Spurs, which is surely what would have to happen for this to come into play. A poaching seems wildly implausible.
5=) Jose Mourinho
Bwahaha. Yes please. You certainly can’t say it wouldn’t be an appointment that chimes with the theory – one to which Spurs are among the more ardent subscribers – that each new manager should be the exact opposite of the previous fool.
5=) Thomas Frank
Just far, far too sensible. Frank would represent something close to the last truly successful managerial appointment Spurs made with the Southampton-era Mauricio Pochettino. Since then it’s been showy elite appointments of managers who treated Spurs like the sh*t on their shoes, wild gambles, or fifth-choice desperation.
A manager doing a quietly effective job further down the Premier League food chain simply won’t do.
4) Thomas Tuchel
To be honest, the only surprise is that it hasn’t happened sooner. He’s a former Chelsea manager with a CV that would satisfy all of Daniel Levy’s big-club delusions. Wouldn’t represent a complete departure from the current set-up, but still a significant enough one. Could easily see this being Levy’s first-choice, but harder to see it being Tuchel’s. Man United’s apparent keenness a factor, too.
3) Marco Silva
Pleasantly surprising to see Silva so prominent in a big next-manager market, because he probably deserves it for the work he’s done at Fulham. Always a danger for mid-table managers that sustained competence is exactly what big clubs ought to want but can also make you a bit invisible. Spurs fans would, we suspect, kick off about this as an idea, but we’ve heard worse ones.
2) Roberto De Zerbi
Obvious appeal in terms of playing style and philosophy to the fans, but also almost no chance of this happening in the short to medium-term, and we grow increasingly convinced Spurs are going to be looking for a manager in the short to medium term.
1) Graham Potter
Says a fair bit that the last time he was significantly linked with Spurs he was quite rightly able to turn his nose up at it in the knowledge something better would come along. Spurs are no better now than they were then really, but Potter would, one suspects, be far less sniffy about the idea now. And it really is about time Spurs had another former Chelsea boss in charge.
