‘I’m done’: Joe Marler retires from international rugby to focus on family

Joe Marler has retired from international rugby and will play no part in the rest of England’s autumn nations campaign, citing the need to prioritise his family saying: “I can’t do what I used to do as well as I once could”.

As exclusively revealed by the Guardian, Marler left the England camp at the start of last week, citing personal reasons, and made himself unavailable for Saturday’s agonising defeat by the All Blacks. It is understood the prop arrived in camp last Sunday but informed Steve Borthwick and a group of senior players of his decision and returned to his family home. While he was keen to stress that he was taking a “day-by-day” approach last week, the writing was on the wall and he brings the curtain down on his England career with 95 caps.

“Playing for England always felt like I was living in a dream bubble,” Marler wrote on social media. “I kept waiting for it to pop and me to suddenly go back to being a gobby, overweight 16-year-old again. But you know when it’s time. I can’t do what I used to do as well as I once could. I can’t keep talking about my family being my priority unless they actually are. I want to keep it untarnished, all these memories of my career, both good and bad. I don’t want to leave my house with my kids crying. I’m ready to make the change.

“The first team-mate I told was Dan Cole. We were sharing a room at the England hotel. I hugged him, he hugged me. The conversation went a bit like this: I love you mate. I love you too. What’s up? I’m done, mate. I know you are.”

Marler stoked the flames before Saturday’s defeat by New Zealand with critical comments about the haka, claiming it should be binned. He later apologised, having clarified his view that opponents should be allowed to challenge the haka. On Saturday, England advanced to the halfway line – as far as regulations permit – while the All Blacks also moved forward in a thrilling piece of theatre.

Marler has retired from international rugby before, in 2018, only to reverse his decision in time for the 2019 World Cup but at 34, another change of heart is unlikely. He has four children with his wife, Daisy, and family considerations played a significant part in his decision to leave camp.

He has spoken candidly about his struggles with spending long periods away from his family and in 2016 he withdrew from the summer tour of Australia. He was convinced by Borthwick to make himself available for the World Cup last year, having previously not appeared for England since the 2022 Six Nations, but when discussing his decision to return to the international fold it was clear that he took some convincing.

While Marler accepted a place in Borthwick’s squad for the autumn internationals and took part in the warm-weather training camp in Girona, a well-placed source has pointed to how Marler has had to battle back from a broken foot to regain fitness last month, as well as how he has fallen down the England pecking order with Ellis Genge fit again after missing the summer tour and his Harlequins team-mate Fin Baxter emerging on to the scene. As a result, Marler realised his heart was no longer in it.

Tellingly, when discussing his return for the 2023 World Cup, Marler said he had sought assurances he would not be “cannon fodder” in the squad. “It’s the friendship and respect of team-mates like Dan that I’ll cherish the most,” added Marler. “The fun we had reaching the Rugby World Cup final in Japan in 2019. Coming off together in the semi-final against South Africa in 2023, sitting down on the bench, patting each other on the leg and saying we did alright there, old son.

“Rugby has taken me places I could never have imagined. We had a big map of the world up on our wall in the kitchen. We put pins in the places we’ve been. The kids have pins in four or five holiday places, Daisy the same. They can’t believe how many I have stuck in. Dad, have you really been there? What’s Uruguay? When you come from a little town in East Sussex, that’s not normal. It’s a wonderful thing.

“When I first got picked to play for England, 14 years ago, I was terrified. I wasn’t good enough. I had bleached hair with red bits in it. I couldn’t even drive myself to Pennyhill Park. I had to ask a mate to drop me off. When he did, he asked me if I could nick him some stash as a souvenir. I met Martin Johnson before training, and he towered over me and told me to get a haircut.

“So I’m incredibly grateful that I got to play 95 times for my country. I have to pinch myself. Did I really do that? I’m grateful to all those people who showed patience as I kept messing up. I’m grateful to the fans who made each match special. I’m grateful to the team-mates who pushed alongside or behind me, and the ones who could do all the things with the ball that I can’t. But most of all I’m grateful to Daisy, Jasper, Maggie, Felix and Pixie for the unwavering support. I’m sad to say goodbye to international rugby. But, I’m really proud, too. Time to exit one dream bubble; time to enter a new one. Big Love.”

Marler’s retirement is a setback for Borthwick. It is understood he was sympathetic to the decision last week but after the defeat by the All Blacks he referenced the inexperience of his current squad. Of the 2023 World Cup squad, Courtney Lawes, Owen Farrell, Ben Youngs, Jonny May, Manu Tuilagi, Billy Vunipola and now Marler have all either retired or made themselves unavailable for selection.

“Joe has been an outstanding servant to English rugby – a tough, uncompromising competitor on the field, and a genuine, one-of-a-kind personality off it,” said the England coach. “We’ll miss his humour, sense of fun, and the energy he brought to the squad. We’re grateful for all he’s given to England rugby, and though we won’t see him in an England jersey any more, he’ll always be part of this team. Thank you, Joe.”